Friday, June 27, 2008

Free Marriage Counseling


Free marriage counseling helps couples save their married life. It enables you to improve your love relationship and get rid of marriage problems. There are a host of free resources currently available for you to strengthen your marriage. Your free marriage counseling specialist identifies the key problems, offers you valuable practical advice and teaches you step-by-step how to save your marriage. You have to keep a few key things in mind before you take up free marriage counseling. The first thing to do is to identify the cause of the marital tension. A free marriage counseling session would be successful only if the man and wife are willing to be honest and take responsibility.

A number of trained workshop leaders offer free services across the country. They often supply free materials to those who attend marriage seminars and conferences. You can learn valuable lessons in marital relations and practical communications skills from those free marriage workshops, conferences, and seminars. These would greatly benefit your marriage and save it from ruin. Many free marriage counseling services offer you free referral information also. They help you search for free marriage workshops in your locality. Some counselors seek the aid of free marriage counseling films and videos before they start to work with the counseling program.

Many counselors offer free services to those who want to receive counseling either before filing a petition for divorce or immediately after filing. Free marriage seminars and workshops are also held by many voluntary organizations. These free marriage counseling programs provide lessons on practical communication skills that help improve the relationship between partners.

Churches, synagogues, and other religious and spiritual organizations usually provide free marriage counseling. Many of them provide a couple-to-couple counseling environment. A number of free marriage counseling programs are available online also.

By Ken Marlborough

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

How Marriage Counseling Helps




People can feel emotional distress and have problem when their marriage is in trouble. Anxiety, anger in marriage, conflict resolution and communication skills for couples are involved in a marriage with problems. Any person in a similar situation can find how marriage counseling helps using online help or going to a therapist. Marital help is not an illusion; committed therapist having experience in this field can help the partners to improve their communication skills; their support can lead happily to resolution.

Psychologist can treat the distress and marriage problems, carrying about the person’s well being. Marriage and relationship issues, anxiety, anger management are treated with success by many psychologists, private and confidential; there are a few professional web site that let us know online how marriage counseling helps. Online counseling is an effective, easy and comfortable way to deal with marriage problems. If partners are unhappy and thinking of consulting with a therapist, then they will quickly find how marriage counseling helps. Psychology care offers the chance to use the services of some committed and professional therapist to help the couple to get their marriage back on track.

Generally, marriage therapists are trained in family systems and have at least two years of experience in clinics; many of them are licensed to diagnose and treat mental disorders and emotional problems, all in the context of couple and families systems; they are always ready to teach how marriage counseling helps. The therapists are involved in a direct and effective manner in the long term well being of families.

Marriage therapists are guiding the individuals with emotional problems during twelve sessions usually. Brief, solution focused treatments are the key of success in marriage counseling. The family centered approach is always effective during the marriage counseling. These are the reasons why it is not difficult to find the right therapist; thanks to the Internet, the primary source of information, a family in trouble can find many professional therapists online, from their web site. Most therapists are asking the couple to have a short conversation on the phone after the first email. The phone conversation will show to the therapist if he can have a sincere and honest collaboration with his patients.

Marriage counseling works this way and the results are more that spectacular. There are also ethical guidelines to assist therapists during their e-counseling activities. The commitment and professionalism of the therapist is the key to solve the couple’s problems, but the partners must collaborate, following the advices and being honest in their answers. A majority of couples are reporting a major improvement in their marital situation after marriage counseling; the percentages are showing how marriage counseling is effective. 98.2% of couples are reporting that the marriage counseling is good or excellent.

Marriage counseling is usually cost-effective and efficient; many therapists are able to teach how to restore the connection between partners, the professionals are teaching how to heal the relations after emotional neglect, infidelity or separation. The counselor is presenting to the partners how to marriage counseling helps is difficult situations and it works even when only one partner is following the advices.

By: Helen Leman

Saturday, June 21, 2008

Marriage Counseling, Before You Get Married?


You feel like you've known each other all your lives even though you've only known each other a few months or years, maybe even just a couple of weeks. You look into each others eyes and see kismet or fate. All starry eyed and dreamy you start planning for happily ever after.

Ok maybe you aren't just being starry eyed. Maybe you have been living together for a while and truly believe it is time to make the union a legal and formal bond. That is absolutely wonderful! No matter what anyone says, there is something special about being married to each other and not just living together.

Now, in some countries the government will not require the couple to undergo any marriage seminars. In most religions and in countries that do not have divorce however marriage counseling is actually mandatory before couples can get married. After all in these countries or faiths, marriage truly is meant to be for life. That being the case, everyone wants to make sure that the pair goes in with their eyes wide open and not covered by rose colored glasses.

Marriage is no joke. It can be fun, exciting, sweet, passionate and absolutely wonderful. It can also be a lot of work. Keep in mind that you are adjusting your life to another person's; someone who you love but is still different from you in a number of ways. Marriage can be a rude awakening for some. It isn't only about the gown and the ceremony and saying, "I do".

Face it folks, we don't always, in fact more often than not, we don't listen to our parents. They may or may not be good examples of how marriages work. They may or may not be together so you may not have a real picture of what is involved, just the glamorized ideal that movies and books show to the general public.

There are organizations like Worldwide Marriage Encounter (WME) that try to give couples a real look at being married. They have special courses such as the evenings for the engaged where a couple meets regularly with an affianced pair in the WME or "encountered" couples home. The WME couple will discuss various things that the affianced pair may or may not have thought about yet. For example, what is the significance of money in the relationship? Is money supposed to be pooled and shared or should it be only the male's income that is spent since he is the breadwinner or head of the family?

How about work? Should the wife continue to work if the husband is earning well enough to support them both? Would they prefer that she stay home and become mother and wife full time? Why?

These questions may seem trivial to some but in the long run, these can be major issues that can lead to separation or divorce. It is best to discuss these matters before any vows are made not after. It can save you a lot of heartache. Why not find out what are the available marriage counseling groups in your area? What have you got to lose? They may even help to make your good relationship great.

By Lesley-Ann Graham

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

What You Need To Know Before Marriage Counseling




Everybody can give you useful advices before during a marriage preparation, but none of these advices is totally correct. Premarital factors will tell you if you should marry or not. If you have a serious relationship, should you keep the situation as it s, pursue marriage or break-up?

Before marriage counseling can give you the right answers. Scientists have found more than ten factors that predict future marital status. There factors are forming the marriage triangle; the main factors are individual traits, couple traits and personal context. Individual traits include emotional health, values and beliefs. Self-esteem is a positive factor, flexibility too; impulsiveness and depression are negative factors; communication skills are very important too

Couple traits include important factors, such as conflict resolution skills, and similarity of goals and values. Personal contexts include family background characteristics, such as existing children, previous marriages, family relationship quality, parents’, relatives’ and friends’ accord and support.

Before marriage counseling is designed to teach couples to improve their communication skills, achieve their marriage goals, and increase the couple strengths. It also helps the couples trying to decide whether marriage is indicate for them in a specific moment. Compatibility issues can be managed with an appropriate knowledge. Before marriage counseling must be based on scientific marriage research and teach conflict resolution in a fun and low-pressure environment. Relationships issues must not seem like big problems’ many relationship problems are normal are shared by numerous couples.

Before marriage counseling must include the knowledge of these factors. Individuals must complete an assessment questionnaire; the couple must study the results together. A professional questionnaire will provide couples with useful information about their weaknesses and strengths, facilitating the couple communication. But the results are also depending on the honesty of the answers.

The best wedding present is a before marriage counseling; this is an important a cost-effective investment for the long term success of your marriage. It is also recommended for the couples that are trying to decide whether the marriage is possible for them.

Every couple is having the same hope: to be happy after the wedding. It is not only a matter or love or luck. Living together before the marriage is not a good option; it is not increasing the chances to have a happy marriage. Before marriage counseling is teaching the appropriate skills that are making the transition from the romance to married life smooth and fluid. You romance must live long after the wedding; it is not a good idea to wait until a relation become stressed before asking a marriage counseling.

Before marriage counseling is more effective and less expensive for any couple; planning a spectacular wedding is often expensive; investing in the success of the marriage is as important as the wedding and less costly. A resilient marriage can be prepared right from the start. The benefits of an appropriate before marriage counseling are helping the couple to build skills, plan long term activities and enhance the strengths.

By: Helen Leman

Monday, June 9, 2008

Marriage And Sexual Relation




Marriage is a social arrangement to allow woman and man to live together; a social acceptance and conformity to maintain sexual relation for reproduction. Social purpose of marriage is to regulate sexual relation between man and woman. This system of sexual behavior differentiates human from other species, builds sexual connection more respectable and meaningful to maintain discipline in the society. Each society has different systems of marriage in relation to its culture, yet, the objective of all is to recognize sexual conduct of partners living together. Sexual activity is the foundation of marriage and fulfillment is the tool for constant relation. Sexual craving is the attraction that drags to togetherness. Under the social system of marriage, couples achieve identity and highest respect in the society that protects their relation.

For nature sexual activity may be procreation but for human it is sexual craving, leads to seek partner for the fulfillment and marriage is the social solution. Society disallows sexual relation before marriage or extra marital affairs, reason behind this if approved there would be no difference between human and other species. Human too would act as animals for seeking partner. For animals may not be dangerous as their sexual periods are in long intervals, on the other hand human have short and frequent could lead to violent atmosphere. Social interference is to arrest such unwanted activities to store rights and peace.

Marriage is portrayed as religious and fortunate that people wait anxiously for this moment to enter married life. Celebrations and custom rituals signify the identity of being Wife / Husband and togetherness. Real life begins for both individuals when they need to share personality and sensual feelings. Sex rules in the beginning of married life for openness and understanding each other. Sex is the instrument that connects both to represent as one to make family, family becomes a fraction of the society. Sexual contentment is essential for first stage to retain married life intact. After some times of marriage sexual desire becomes part of normal routine. First stage of married life is sensitive; each partner’s endeavor is to influence own approach to create self environment in the home. This is psychological war to create own dominance, weaker one has to surrender. Man surrenders when he is economically, physically and emotionally weak. Women are more sensible, understand social pressure on women as each religion prescribes women’s role as submissive. Also as I feel man is not as keen as woman to bind self in the family. It is woman’s attempt; man sticks in the family. Woman’s desire of own family is for protection/security of own and children. Woman needs freedom but with protection and security, to an adult woman her own family is her security. Keeping “family” in the mind she sacrifices the dominance. Without woman there is no family so woman is the pillar of the family structure. In modern world woman’s rights have awakened her to educate self and economic independence. Has revolutionized the social thinking about woman, she is now more independent and self esteemed resulted many changes of married life. Both men and women have to compromise for stable family. Old system of marriage is not practical any more, both man and woman need to be familiar with each other before marriage, so can understand the personality and history can help to advance. Solutions become easier to rectify weaker points in order to consecrate family value.

• Sincerity of both the partners builds confidence in them to last relation.
• In many a cases disappointment takes place when desire exists for unreachable in any form. "Adore what you have and what is within reach".
• Sincerity of both the partners builds confidence in them to last relation.
• Sexual satisfaction is enticement to keep relation so not to hesitate. Satisfy partner in whatever painless/ non hurting manner.
• Many marital disputes are due to past sexual relations that are kept secret. When exposed becomes matter of life and death. Revelation in the beginning avoids misunderstanding.
• Compromising own ego for positive reasons builds smoothness.


Second stage of marriage is the outcome of sexual activities; a birth of new member of the family. New member draws all the attentions of family life and first stage of life becomes memories. Wife and Husband experience own image in the child that incites them to care more than self. Child’s biological appearance attracts adults to submit selves for compassion towards child is the natural instinct for safe growth. Responsibility towards growth of the new born becomes important activity. Woman’s sexual interest weakens for limited period, is natural law to pay attention for best breast feeding. Women can not avoid breast feeding as pressure builds up in breast that has to be released, relief she gets from release is pleasure for her. This natural law is to feed the child perfectly. As a father becomes more responsible towards family and child so involves more into the family affairs. His submission to the situation is to protect child from any unwanted troublesome. Second stage defines father as protector and mother as producer of future generation of own identity. Sexual activity becomes second to child’s growth, especially woman who works heavily for child’s growth. However, sexual desire is such a greed that never eliminates until reaches unsuitable age, is to add members in the family. So the second stage of marriage is giving birth and taking care of family to grow. Contribution of their role steps further towards more members and their health. Woman’s role is important as she needs to care children and diverts her attention from husband to child and house but if she goes to office her life becomes chaotic. Overburdened lady weakens her health and sexual desire, irritation and depression builds up due to weakness and intense involvement. Man on the other hand finds self in little anxiety as the approach/response is not as before. More necessities and demands of family load him if he is economically weak. On the whole life of both wife and husband is not as easy as before. The egoism and self-esteem overpowers them when feel hurt, leads to arguments. An argument is the first stage of worsening family. In a good family both realize the situation and accommodate for smooth run. Normally, this situation prompts to find ways to criticize each other makes uneasy life. The test of constructive married life begins; most educated and able people succeed this test to step towards third stage of married life, on the other hand uneducated or self-centered people face this situation as hard test and many of them fail. Those fail break up and search for new beginning or search for extra affair. Good and bad relation of wife and husband influences children too as they experience by observing. The relation becomes doubtful to them mom and pop becomes less relevant especially during puberty. This is what we observe in divorced or violent families, children too become violent and depressed. Second stage is also very difficult for egoistical issue-less couple, feeling of partner as burden or loneliness drives to extra marital affairs.

• Remember best moment enjoyed with the partner is positive signal of attraction to prolong relation.
• Anger infuriates; is fire only cool approach can extinguish.
• Extra marital life is curse to married life.
• There is no one else to come to assist if brought would worsen further. So wife and husband together need to console each other and prepare for next challenge.
• There is no house where difference of opinions are not there but adjusting, accommodating and making understand the good and bad part will help. Avoid arguments as escalates situation and never helps. Patience is water to fire.
• Sexual activities are best jokes, games, attraction, consolation, affection, rejuvenation, temporary medication from depression and etc. So of use this gifted source prepares for next challenge.
• Birth of child conveys purpose of the family so don’t delay. Child bring purpose to live. Adoption of child too serves purpose for issue-less family. Loneliness is curse can drive to wrong situation; business and involvement in daily affairs can evade this situation.

By: Sadashivan Nair

Sunday, June 8, 2008

Marriage Counseling


A family is the building block of a society, and happy families make a healthier society. Marriage counseling helps the married couple build a stable bondage. It assists in the reconciliation of the differences.

Marriage counseling is a form of psychotherapy given to married couples to resolve marital problems. Most problems can be solved with a short counseling session. Sometimes a prolonged therapy is required in which the husband and wife meet the counselor individually and collectively several times. These sessions also help you improve your relationship with spouse by straightening behavioral problems and correcting emotional and mental disorders.

Marital conflicts are a universal phenomenon. Wise people seek the help of marriage counselors when misunderstanding, frustration or some other miseries strike their family. The main problem behind most issues is a lack of communication. Other problems such as ego clashes, illness, infidelity, insatiable sex, and anger also cause much damage to marriages. A timely counseling can solve the problems through love, commitment, and affection. The first step in marriage counseling is to identify the problems prevailing in the relationship. The counselor then finds ways and means to restore the broken relationship by resolving the conflicts and healing the wounds.

Marriage counseling is usually done by trained psychotherapists specialized in family systems. They help their clients overcome family problems through interactive sessions. The marriage counselor presents your problems in a new perspective and offers positive options. He can also employ new strategies to overcome the miseries of a bad marriage.

All marriages can’t be saved, but, of course, some can. Most marriages on the verge of breaking up can be saved with the help of a good counselor. When choosing a marriage counselor, check his training, educational background, and experience. Also be certain that he is licensed. Other things to consider are the fees, insurance coverage, and the duration of therapy.

By Ken Marlborough

Thursday, June 5, 2008

The Basics of Marriage Counseling


Almost half of all marriages end in divorce. That is why there is an increase in couples seeking marriage counseling. Nobody wants to think that the marriage they are in will end. Marriage counseling offers a way for couples to work thorough problems with an outside influence. Marriage counseling can help couples to rebuild a marriage that was on the way to divorce.

Marriage counseling is a type of therapy that helps married couples resolve problems they may be having in their marriage. Most often counseling is conducted with both partners present. However, sometimes there will be individual sessions depending on the couples needs. The basis for marriage counseling is research that has shown problems in a marriage are best solved through communication and working together. Marriage counseling usually lasts a short period of time, until the problems are resolved and the marriage is back on track and the couple can handle problems on their own. In a session the counselor will ask questions, listen and analyze problems. The counseling usually starts with an analysis of the marriage and its problems. Then the problems are worked through to an amicable conclusion.

Marriage counselors are trained in psychotherapy. They also have an understanding about families, how to understand client’s needs and problems. They also have training that allows them to help clients work through the problems to reach conclusions. All of this training lets them be able to identify underlying problems. A good marriage counselor will not make a client feel guilty or blame. They will teach clients to work through problems and get over bad feelings.

Marriage counseling can help couples open the lines of communication. Communication has been shown to be the key to a health

By Jeanette Pollock

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

What Destroys A Marriage




Many marriages and dating relationships fail years before the loving couples meet. The exposure to a value system that promotes the acquisition of material possessions has a direct affect on our development as children. We learn early in life to take control of our material possessions.

This activity awakens our selfish nature and fortifies it as we mature. We learn to believe that we can do what we want with those possessions, my wife, my husband, my money, my toys, my bike, my car, my woman, my man, and mine, mine, mine! Unconsciously we believe these possessions are our slaves and should be at our beckon call or perform a particular function that we desire. At anytime, when our possessions do not conform to our desires or expectation, we become outraged. The reality is these are not our possessions, especially human beings.

We want our mates to take a subservient position to our desires. This is the beginning of the end of a healthy marriage or dating relationship. The core of the problems in marriages and dating relationships today is that we rely on traditions and false promises by others and institutions that manipulate our hopes and dreams for profits. We have been led to believe that institutions are held to a higher standard and do not fall into the same category as others who are motivated by selfish desires; but they are! There are in excess of 400,000 marriage counselors, workshops, and therapy sessions posted on the Internet.

Marriage counselors are professing to have the solution for a fee. Do you think they care about your marriage or dating relationship? The judicial branch of government is pointing the finger at the legislative branch. The legislative branch is pointing the finger at the judicial branch, and church organizations are partnering with social scientist to qualify for federal funding to rebuild marriages. Where is the solution?

Dating relationships that lead to marriage is the fundamental social institution deeply rooted in all societies. To uphold and defend the institution of marriage, we must place emphasis on the truth. The institution of marriage should not be built on the traditional foundation of the past. The institution of marriage must be built on a strong foundation representing truth, sincerity, sacrifice, and cooperation, mutually putting our desires and opinions to bay.

Individuals who enter a dating relationship or marriage with opposing objectives, which are to fulfill their own desires, will have a failed dating relationship or marriage. Both participants must understand that individual desires and opinions are the furthest from the truth. The truth is what exists at the moment, or an incident that occurred in the past. The truth is not what one may think is going to happen in the future, nor is it what one may believe should have or could have happened. Falsehood, seeking to fulfill individual desires, and imposing one’s opinions on another are destructive ingredients for all relationships and marriages.

It is time for us to face the truth and to adopt a different posture when seeking a dating partner or a marriage companion. We must change our perspective and evaluate why living together in harmony is such a momentous task. We then must apply the true meaning of love and togetherness and then we can begin to live happily ever after!

By: Naim A. Samad

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

All The Secrets Behind Catholic Marriage Counseling




Who is not searching for greater peace in marriage or family? Who does not desire more peace in mind and heart? Catholic marriage counseling is helping everyone to have great relationships, taking concrete action because the future of humanity passes by the way of families. Catholic families are usually forming a community of love in their homes. Professional and experienced counselors are participating in the development of families, to maintain peace in families.

The mission of those who are inspired to take concrete action by working together to maintain peace and harmony in marriages is not easy. Catholic marriage counseling is supporting the families in their efforts to become what they are in Christ. The families are receiving serious help to be established in His peace. As vital cells of society, families must be strengthen; take back the confidence in itself, identify the dangers and evils menacing them.

Catholic marriage counseling is encouraging people to stand firm against evil, to create the environment favorable for marriage; those who are suffering will be encouraged to restore their situation and heal those who are wounded. Catholic marriage counseling is proclaiming the truth about family and marriage by deed and word, helping partners to talk honestly with each other about the condition of their family.

When a family is in trouble, when there are real problems, the partners are worried about their future, catholic marriage counseling is always there to help and support. Most people can resolve everyday unpleasant situations on their own; family and friends can help too. When the problems persist, then professional help is necessary and catholic marriage counseling is always ready to help. There is always hope for marriage in trouble.

A couple must decide to work with a professional and committed counselor if the children are often in the middle of the couple’s problems, or they are suffering in other way. If partners have tried the methods they know to improve their relationship and anything worked, catholic marriage counseling will work. If a partner has had an affair and the partner is unable to forgive; if the tension in the family is increasing, the couple must ask for professional help.

Catholic marriage counseling is helping people to create a godly marriage, a more faithful family life, can strengthen the couple in the spiritual and emotional journey. Catholic marriage counseling is taking serious action to defend the holy matrimony against divorce. Family life and marriage are under an unexpected attack; couples must have the chance reconciliation. Catholic marriage counseling is taking marital disputes out of divorce courts into reconciliation services. If the marriage is non-Christian, community groups can help, if the marriage is Christian, churches will offer compassionate reconciliation services.

Catholic marriage counseling is not imposing Christian Marriage on non-Christian; the goal is to offer compassionate, professional and committed reconciliation services. The Catholic marriage counseling reminds partners their familial duties, redirect them into marital education and reconciliation services, and not pursue an process.

By: Helen Leman

Monday, June 2, 2008

Is Conflict Healthy In Marriage?




Today my three-year-old daughter told my husband that she wants to be married. When he asked her why, she replied, "Because you get to be nice to one another".

Are you nice to your partner? Or do you find yourself involved in heated competition, endless cycles of discord, and/or tiresome critical thinking?

According to Diane Sollee, founder of the Coalition for Marriage, Family and Couples Education, LLC (CMFCE), "Every happy, successful couple has approximately ten areas of 'incompatibility' or disagreement that they will never resolve." In other words, it's possible to disagree with your spouse and still have a fulfilling relationship. It's all in how you do it.

Because you and your spouse may have ten issues that you will not be able to agree upon at any given time, how will you be able to resolve these conflicts and maintain a happy medium in your household?

First and foremost don't avoid or side step the concerns that each of you have. Conflict in marriage is not an "if", but rather a "when". And according to Sollee, avoidance is one of the key factors determining a couple's separation and divorce. Make sure you voice your opinions, but do it with the understanding that you don't need to change your spouse. Focus, rather, on the way you present yourself in times of conflict.

Secondly, welcome and embrace change. While you have committed to "love until death", you haven't promised to stay the same through the course of your life. Everyone is learning and growing at different paces and in different places. Don't let this growth, change the positive ways you act towards your husband or wife.

Next, understand that even if you were to divorce and remarry, you would still have to deal with the short comings of your new partner and they would have to deal with yours. You'd just have a new set of disagreements. Nobody's perfect. Realizing this fact and internalizing it, will give you a better grip on how to cope with the irreconcilable differences you have in your current marriage.

Finally, don't let your disagreements contaminate the rest of your relationship. Choose to exhibit positive behaviors towards your spouse. Deciding to become more affectionate or offering encouraging words on a regular basis can go a long way. It will get you through some tough times. Often partners eventually mirror each other's behavior inside and outside of their disagreements.

Don't let conflict put a sour taste in your relationship. If you want to have a healthy and happy marriage, your goal can be to agree with the understanding that disagreeing is a part of life.

By: Keishia Lee-Louis